purehell's Diaryland Diary

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im afraid of snakes

Shauna is coming home soon. I cant remember if its today or tomorrow, but i can feel the resentment growing more in the pit of my stomach every day so i know its soon. I suppose my worries begin even moreso now that ill know she has access to call him again. I suppose she could have while she was away visiting family, but probably not much time to be sneaky with boris, the kids, and family around.

When i was seeing a therapist for a short time over all of this, my therapist always referred to Shauna as a "sneaky snake in the grass". It reminds me of a time when i was a young girl walking home from school one day. I decided to take a shortcut through the woods so that i could make it home faster. I remember everything was fine but suddenly I was stopped short of a snake in my path. I was terrified. I wanted so much to run but for some reason my feet were frozen to the ground. I was too scared to move, even though i knew i needed to so that i could get away and be safe. Yet for some reason i stood there frozen in fear.

I feel like im in the same situation right now.

Yes, i believe my therapist was right. She is a sneaky snake in the grass.


I want so much to be able to run this time and save myself from the pain. ************************************* SCROLL UP AND CLICK ON THE ARCHIVES (IN RED) TO READ MORE POSTINGS FOR THIS DIARY

8:11 a.m. - January 05, 2007

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