purehell's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Homecoming Well, Shauna came home this weekend. I received a call Saturday evening from her but chose not to answer the phone. I didnt want to pretend everything was ok and thought it be most fair to both of us just to avoid the situation entirely. She left a message on my voicemail letting us know that they were on their way home and wanted to know if we would like to go out to dinner Sunday evening, along with marcia and kevin. She said that Boris will be leaving town for awhile next week and thought it would be the last opportunity for the guys to see each other. The guys leave for Iraq in February before Boris returns home from his training. We knew we werent going but for some reason i felt like i should have some grand excuse for why we couldnt make it. Why? Im not sure? To avoid hurting anyones feelings maybe? Im not sure why i do that. Instead i chose not to call her back. I figured she would know why we decided to opt out on her own and respect that. The next morning i dreaded going to church. I knew more than likely she would be there with the kids. I considered not going at all but finally forced myself to put my big girl panties on and deal with it. I couldnt hide in my house forever ...and i probably needed church more than anything at this time. After church we met some others for lunch to discuss a group that was being formed. Shauna called me during that time and i told her i would have to call her back. Eventually she grew tired of waiting because she sent me a text message that read: "6:30 Logans" .....i texted her back explaining to her that we werent going to dinner and just sort of left it at that. When we got home from our meeting Nikki kept bugging me to let Alex come over and play. The girls are both in the same brownie/girlscout troop and they were suppose to start selling their girlscout cookies. I know that i cant keep the girls from each other without letting on that something was wrong between us, so i caved in and told nikki that she could call alex and invite her to come over. I told her to tell shauna that i could come pick her up and then drop her off afterwards but shauna said she would just drop her off on her way to the grocery store. Simple enough, right? When Shauna came back to pick Alex up a few hours later she asked if Nikki can come over and spend the night. ooo k. sure. Well, at this point Mike and I decided we might as well go to dinner and a movie. We were planning on taking nikki to a movie but since shes spending the night at alex's/shauna's.....we might as well still keep our plans and maybe just choose a different movie. Dinner went well. Allie and Justin ended up joining us at the restaurant and it was nice. After dinner Mike and I went to the movies and guess who we see? Yup, Shauna, Boris, Marcia and Kevin. *sighs* Anyway, it was fine but i had alot of anxiety. In the beginning of the movie i had to excuse myself and go to the ladies room to sort of collect my thoughts. Part of me wanted to leave and just get away from it all. Afterall, the main reason i wanted to go to the movies was to escape from this nightmare for a lil bit. Apparently thats not a possibility. Its there. Always. *********************************** SCROLL UP AND CLICK ON THE ARCHIVES (IN RED) TO READ MORE POSTING FOR THIS DIARY 12:18 p.m. - January 08, 2007 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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